The Worth of A Brother
by Target Zero
Summary: 4 times. He could count 4 other times when he sat by his unconscious brother's hospital bedside; hoping that this won't be the end for him, that his little brother will somehow manage to beat the odds, that John Sheppard wasn't going to die. Pre-series with David (Dave) and John Sheppard.
1. Chapter 1 Mom would know what to do

The Fith time

David sat in the chair, his eyes never leaving the still form on the hospital bed. The low hum of the machines and the heart monitor had long since sunk to the back of his subconscious, only resurfacing if the rhythm happened to change. As he watched the slow rise and fall of breathing, he could feel his own heart rate pounding in his ears.

4 times. He could count 4 other times when he sat by his unconscious brother's hospital bedside; hoping that this won't be the end for him, that his little brother will somehow manage to beat the odds, that John Sheppard wasn't going to die.

**Chapter 1**: Mom would know what to do

"John, you didn't' eat anything." David watched his five year old brother stare at the plate in front of him. "John?" He waited till his brother turned to look at him. His eyes were sunken and dark rimmed while his cheek bones stuck out in great contrast. "You need to eat something." After a tense moment John climbed down from his chair and walked away from his dinner, never having touched a bite. He'd been doing a lot of that lately; ever since Mom died.

David missed his mother just as much as his younger brother did, but knew better than to starve himself. He had tried everything to get John to eat but his brother just didn't seem interested. Instead, he spent most of his time sitting somewhere and just staring. It had gotten to the point where he barely spoke.

Of course he had told his father but Patrick Sheppard was a busy man and he seemed to be enjoying the new quieter version of his hyperactive son. Where he once was unable to keep John still seemed no longer a problem. In his mind, it was just one less thing he had to deal with.

The death of Sarah Alice Sheppard was sudden; a car accident while she was on her way to pick up John from pre-school. In the chaos that followed, John had been forgotten. She had died before John had met up with them at the hospital, and so he was the only one that hadn't said goodbye. The funeral was on a cloudy Saturday and both boys were on their best behaviour. David was the only one who noticed the absence of any life in John that day. He let himself be ushered along like a lost puppy. As the days and weeks went by, it got worse. John no longer ate or spoke. There was something wrong but he didn't know what it was. At times he felt angry towards his brother, thinking that this was just John's way of getting attention; that he was playing the pity card.

He spent the evening reading and playing by himself. Before turning in for the night, he decided to check on his brother. As he walked into John's room, he quickly found him lying on the carpet by his bed. "John" Quickly he crouched down by his side, trying to wake him by gently shaking his shoulder. When he didn't wake, David shook harder.

"DAD! DAD!" He slowly turned John onto his side, surprised by how light he was. His skin was pale and his breathing was barely noticeable. "SOMEBODY HELP ME!"

A house maid came sweeping in, taking in John's vitals and hoisting him into her arms as she raced down the hall to the main floor. Within minutes an ambulance was there carting him away to the awaiting hospital.

When David was allowed to see him, John was lying in a bed that was much too big for him. He made his way to his brother's side, listening to the conversion in the hall between the doctor and his father. Apparently, John was in shock. He had no idea what it meant but just by looking at his brother's still form, he knew it wasn't good. He was half the size he was a month ago and his skin colour was too dull. After some times, the doctor came to talk to him.

He explained to David that John was having a really hard time adjusting to Mom being gone, and as the older brother, it was his job the help out as much as he could. And that's exactly what David did. It took nearly a year to get the smiling hyperactive John back, but he did. And he vowed he would never let something like that happen again.


	2. Chapter 2 I should have checked up on

**Chapter 2**: I should have checked up on you

"John, you better be back for super or Dad's going to kill you." David watched his 9 year old brother bundle himself up for the cold winter weather outside. Ignoring his brother's warnings, John pulled on his toque.

"I won't be long David, beside Dad won't notice I'm not there anyway." With a quick sideways grin, John was out the door and racing through the knee high snow towards the woods. David watched from the window as his brother disappeared from view. He wasn't worried since John had spent lots of time in the smalls woods near the house; he pretty much knew it like the back of his hand.

What annoyed him the most was the fact that he was the only who knew where to find John at any point in time. Ever since their mother's death, David felt like he had been nominated with the task of watching his brother; and he hated it. He loved John, but he didn't understand why he had to make sure his little brother was where he should be all the time. Watching his brother disappear into the woods, David grinned at the thought of John getting in trouble when he would return late for dinner. That would teach him.

For the rest of the afternoon David watched the flurry of activity throughout the house. Caterers, decorators and organisers rushed to and fro in a mad frenzy trying to meet their deadline. Tonight was his father's annual dinner where only the most powerful and prominent business men were invited. David didn't exactly understand the entire political game behind the event but he did know that this was big deal; and he and John were to be on their best behaviour.

His father would often tell him that once he was older he would understand but until then he had to make sure not to embarrass the family name. At 15 years old, he had had more than enough practice and found that he enjoyed the event. His brother however, despised it. He hated having to stand around, not doing anything but talking for hours on end. His brother was much too restless for such formal activities. John would stick around just long enough to make an appearance but then disappear.

David sometimes wondered if John was maybe adopted. Glancing at his watched, he decided he should go get dresses knowing fully well that John still hadn't returned but too annoyed to see it as his problem. Let Dad worry about it for once.

As the sun set, guests started to arrive, all of which were well dresses and David did his father proud; standing beside at the door greeting the new arrivals. He went from group to group exchanging season's greetings with his father's business partners and other he knew from previous galas. He had a good memory for people's names and enjoyed talking about business topics.

It was only hours later when he noticed he still hadn't seen his brother. He figure John would be holed up in his room hiding like he did every year. Sometimes David really didn't understand his brother. Resolved to drag him downstairs for at least an hour, David marched up the stairs and down the hall towards John's room.

"John! Are you hiding in here?" As he pushed the door opened, he jabbed at the light switch to illuminate the room. There in the middle of the bed was a giant lump under the covers. "You know you're supposed to be downstairs. Dad's going to be.." His sentence was cut short when he stepped in a cold puddle of water near the bed. Looking down, David could see his brother's toque, mitts and jacket lying in a soaking heap. "John, you know you have to hang your wet clothes when you come from outside."

Just above a whisper, John's voice filtered through the pile of blankets. "Go …away Dave…" The vein above David's temple began to pulse. This was so typical of his brother.

"Fine, stay here!" He threw his arms out in an elaborate jester. "Just wait till Dad notices you're not there. He's going to be pissed." David waited in silence for a few seconds. Normally an angry tirade complete with threats of their father's anger had John doing whatever needed to be done; this was a trick he had often used to make him cooperate. However, this time John made no effort to move, adding more to David's annoyance. "You're such a spoiled brat, you know that?!" And with that, David turned on his heels and stormed out the room, slamming the door behind him for good measures.

By the time he made it back to the party, he had resolved to be the best son he could be in order to win his father approval and become more of his favourite than his younger brother. Truth is, throughout the night David half expected John to come strolling down the stairs like nothing was amiss. When 11 o'clock rolled around and David made his way to his room for the night, he debated on whether or not to stop and check on John but he was too angry with his brother's stubbornness. Instead he walked right on passed.

The next morning, David had all but forgotten his angry outburst towards his brother. Once dressed, he made his way towards John's room to see if he was awake. He quickly knocked as he swung open the door, not waiting for a reply.

"Johnny, time to get up!" As he closed the distance between the door and the bed, he became aware of a growing weight in the pit of his stomach. Nothing had moved since last night; that including the lump under the blankets that he could only assume was his brother. John had never been one to sleep in late and David knew right away something was wrong. "John?" When he didn't get a reply, he slowly started pulling away the blankets. "Come on John, stop playing."

When the last blanket fell to the ground, David felt like his own throat had clamped shut; trapping the yells for help in his throat. John lay still fully clothed on his bed but his skin was a sickly pale blue. Tremors tore through his small body and a layer of perspiration covered his entire body. When David reached out to shake his younger brother's arm, he felt like he might as well be touching ice.

"DAD!"

Once again, John was whisked away by an ambulance. David sat in the waiting area while his father spoke with the doctors. As he waited, the seconds seemed to slow; if only he had gone to John's bed side last night. This was his fault, no one else's.

John was hospitalized for 1 month, suffering from severe hypothermia which had developed in pneumonia. When John eventually left the hospital, he was quieter than he'd ever been; no witty remarks, no grin, nothing. As before though, that only lasted a few days. In no time, John was back to his old self.


	3. Chapter 3 Just that Lucky

A big thank you to everyone who has read, left a comment, favored or followed my story. It is greatly appreciated. I'm not one for long stories or chapters so I hope you find these satisfying.

I don't own the characters. They belong to the creators of Stargate Atlantis.

**Chapter 3:** Just that lucky

"John, this conversation is over. Every day when you get back home from school, you are to do your homework and concentrate on your academics. I don't want you anywhere near the tree line again, is that clear?" Patrick Sheppard slammed his fist on the corner of his desk in anger. John looked like he was going to continue arguing but thought twice about it with one glance towards David.

Without another word, John stormed out of his father's study heading towards the front door. He didn't really know where he was going yet but at the moment anywhere was better.

"John wait up?" David nearly had to run to catch up with his fourteen year old brother. He knew his brother would be angry but now he was just overreacting. "Don't walk away from me John."

"Why couldn't you keep your mouth shut Dave." John nearly spat the words as he turned to face his older brother. "You always ruin everything for me!"

"I ruin everything? You're the one who's so selfish all the time. Why can't you just listen to what dad says. I'm the one who always has to lie for you and go out there to find you." David straightened out like he's seen his father do countless times before. His brother was being unreasonable about this. "You're a selfish brat John and I'm tired of it."

For a second David really though John would hit him, but instead the youngest just turned around and stormed out the front door. "You only ever think about yourself John!" He called after him.

John's feet carried him past the garage and out into the back yard before his mind was able to catch up with him. Of all the things John loved the most, he enjoyed spending time in the forest that surrounded the house. It was the one place he knew his father or his brother wouldn't come looking for him. There was just something liberating about the serene woods. But of course Dave had to tell their father. Part of him wanted to keep going into the forest just to defy his family, but he also knew how much trouble he would be in. No, he would just hang out in the stables for a few hours and wait till they forgot all about it. Then he would be free again, just like last time.

Assuming he was being watched, he made a deliberate turn towards the horse stable. He didn't really have a plan, he never did. Tension between himself and his father had been mounting lately; ever since he scored so high on the stupid IQ test the school made him take. Personally he hadn't understood what all the fuss was about but he had noticed how happy his father had been when he found out. Since then, John had been pressured on a daily basis to improve his grades and take on extra credits to fast track his academics. He quickly regretted taking that test so seriously.

Inside the stable, John allowed himself a deep breath while he unclenched his fists. Between his brother and his father, John felt like he was just meant to be a robot; follow order, do well in school and stay out of the way when he wasn't needed. Once again, his anger started boiling inside him. Determined, he started saddling his favorite horse thinking a long horseback ride would do him good. If he couldn't go in the woods, then horseback riding was the next best thing.

Six hours later, David paced the living room. John had apparently gone for a horseback ride but no one has seen him since. Sure his brother was angry and needed to cool off some but being gone this long was ridiculous; just another example of his brother's total disregard for responsibility. Deciding to check the stables again before bothering his father, David made his way outside. Just as he was entering the open doors of the stables, he spotted his brother's horse coming over the crest of a hill. He couldn't see John at first, but as the animal got closer he could just make out his brother's slouched form.

John straightened up once he saw David waiting for him. "Came to check on me?" the usual banter told David that his brother was no longer angry. Without slowing, John led his horse into the stable to its stall.

He followed his younger brother. "Where were you? It's been 6 hours!" The silence stretched between the two. "John!" David could have sworn he had just seen his brother wince. After a few minutes, John slowly swung his right leg over the horse, gripping tightly to the saddle. He visibly paled when his feet touched the ground, taking in a sharp breath of air. "John?" David gripped his brother's arm to steady the swaying form.

"I'm okay." John took a deeper breath and closed his eyes. "I'm fine."

David knew his little brother better than to accept the word _fine_ as an accurate description. "What's wrong?" David tried to turn his brother so he was facing him. Once again John took in a deep breath, growing slightly paler. It seemed to be taking all of John's concentration just to stay upright.

"A bear spooked the horse, it threw me off." John forced out through clenched teeth. David looked at his brother; he didn't seem to worse for wear, but he had learned that lesson the hard way last time. John needed to get checked out; who knows what kind of injuries could be hidden.

"Come on, let's get back to the house." Still holding John's arm David moved to guide his little brother back to the house. There he'll be able to get a better look at him and Dad would be able to decide whether a trip to the hospital was needed. That idea quickly disappeared, however, when John tried to take a step forward. In seconds the stable swirled dizzily around him and John could feel his consciousness slipping along with his calm. If David hadn't been so close, John would have crashed to the ground. Helping his brother lean against the stall wall, David quickly noticed his brother's heavy breathing has he fought to stay conscious. "What's wrong?"

It took a few minutes before John could answer him. "It hurts to breathe or move. I think I may have broken something." John closed his eyes in pain while he leaned heavily on the wall and his brother. With David's help, the two managed to get John down to the ground before he fell. Instantly his arms snaked around his ribs to try to ease the pain. Slightly panicked, David didn't know what to do. He didn't want to leave John but he needed to get help.

"I'm going to get Dad, okay Johnny? Don't move." He waited for John to acknowledge him before he left. To his credit, John managed to straighten up slightly and look more alert.

If Patrick had been annoyed for being disturbed again by John's latest misadventure, it quickly disappeared the second he saw his youngest son slumped in the stable. An ambulance was called and the family once again found themselves in the hospital waiting area. John had broken 2 ribs and cracked 1, topped off with a mild concussion. The tension that had been there earlier that day had been put aside. John kept waiting for the lecture from his father that was sure to come. But Patrick never said anything.

When they made it back to the house, everyone felt exhausted and easily retreated to their own rooms. Patrick Sheppard, however could not find sleep. After half an hour of trying he decided he might as well as get some work done. As he sat at his desk, rereading the same business report for the fifth time, he put that aside too. His mind could not put aside the image of John slumped by the wall. With a heavy sigh, he poured himself a glass of his finest scotch.

The next day was very quiet at the Sheppard household. Patrick was immersed in business meetings most of the day, while David and John spent the day together. "Why do you always seem to find trouble? I mean you've been ridding for years without falling."

"I'm just that lucky." John grinned back.

"Yeah lucky I came looking for you." It was David's turn to grin. Neither one of them wanted to imagine what would have happened if no one had come looking for him.

Feeling slightly uncomfortable with the thought, John shifted on his bed. "Thanks Dave," John said before grinning "you know, for coming to spy on me."


	4. Chapter 4 Sheppard ego

**Chapter 4:** Don't assume

David's pinched the bridged of his nose as he waited for his coffee order. He tried not to make a face as he inspected the overall establishment from the other side of the counter. He knew this coffee would not be the best he had ever tasted but it would do the job.

Picking up his drink, he made his way back towards his car. He quickly scanned the local radio stations hoping to find something of interest despite the early hour. The hospital was only a few minutes away but David was compelled to arrive there looking the most relaxed he possibly could.

When his phone had rung at 1 that morning, he knew it wasn't anything good. Before picking up, he mentally scanned through all the recent business projects he currently had on the table. Needless to say it was a total surprise to hear an unfamiliar voice of a hospital nurse. Somehow John had managed to get himself into trouble; again.

It seems John was involved in a car accident. The nurse assured him his brother would be fine but they needed to contact family. After pondering what he would do, David decided not to tell their father just yet; he would first go over there and get the full story before involving Patrick Sheppard.

Though John had always found ways to get himself in trouble, David couldn't help but feel his younger brother was doing it on purpose. In the last few years, John had done everything against their father's wished; an attitude that had done nothing to ease the growing rift between the family. David had always been the one to try and mend the rift but since he had started working at Sheppard Industries as well, he decided that the two should work out their own problems. Things went well for some time but that quickly changed when John announced he was going to enlist in the air force. Since then, the two barely spoke and when they did the tension in the air was visible for everyone to see.

He easily found a vacant spot to park and made his way towards the nurse's desk. After a few questions, they directed him to the 3rd floor where he would find his brother. This wasn't the first time John had found himself in the hospital and since the nurse said he was stable David took his time. He was still trying to organise his thoughts.

As he approached the corner, he could hear the nurses talking. "He's lucky to be alive. Apparently the accident scene was horrific."

"I heard the guy that hit him was twice over the legal limit. Just some young punk." Came another voice. "Anyway, the cops won't let him off easy."

So that was it; his brother had been drinking and he crashed his car; the car dad gave him. He waited a few minutes before walking the rest of the way to the counter. There he asked the nurses which room he would find his brother. The nurse checked her chart before answering. "The car accident, he's in room 309 just down the hall." He gave her a slight nod of thanks before heading in that direction. Years of practice helped him keep his face a mask.

As he strode through the quiet corridor, he thought of a thousand things he would say to his younger brother, most of them condescending in nature. This was just like John; careless.

However, all of his witty remarks died on his tongue when he rounded the corner and enter into his brother hospital room. There lay his brother, looking so frail in the hospital bed surrounded by various machines. As David slowly approached, he mentally took in all of John's injuries; the bruising and cuts on his left temple and arms, his right wrist encased in a cast and the leg brace around his left leg.

"Well there's a surprise." John's voice sounded faint and coarse. He hadn't noticed John was awake, much less lucid. David quickly collected himself and made his way to his brother's bedside.

He looked him over once again. "So you crashed the car." He did his best to keep his voice even.

John took in a big breath, his eyes closing shut for a second before answering. "So they tell me." Though he was happy his brother was here and not his father, he would much rather have neither at the moment. Everything was still a blur in his memory and the pain medication wasn't helping him sort anything out.

"Pity, I thought better of you." David easily took the seat near the foot of the bed.

John took a second to process his brother's words. "What?"

David regarded his younger brother for a moment. "I guess being over the legal limit will do that to you. I really thought you were done with your reckless rebellion but by drinking and driving you're putting other lives in danger. "

Though he felt his temple pulse with every heart beat and pain raced up his body with every movement, John understood his brother's implications at once. "Should have known that's what you'd jump to."

"I'm sorry?" In that instant John couldn't help but see his father there instead. The tone of voice and the body language were identical.

Fighting just to stay awake, John attempted to defuse the situation quickly. "Nothing. Listen man, can we not do this now. I'm not really feeling up to it at the moment." The silence that followed was heavy and awkward.

David had taken his brother's avoidance as a sign of defeat; a confession of sorts. With a satisfied smug, he brought himself to his feet and headed out into the hall. "I'll take care of the paper work so dad won't find out just yet." Though he didn't approve of his brother's actions, he knew John wasn't ready to deal with the full wrath of their father or the legal fallout.

As promised, he signed all the paper work and paid all the bills. When his brother was sober enough to walk out of here, he shouldn't have anything to worry about. The nurse had asked him to stay for a few seconds while she contacted a police officer to go over the report with him. That suited David just fine; he would eventually be in contact with them sooner or later. For legal purposes, he needed to know if they were pressing charges against John.

The officer had started by reviewing with him the details of the accident itself. There are no words to describe the shock he received. He had been wrong about his brother. John had simply been at the wrong place, at the wrong time; or so the saying goes. He had been hit by a transport heading the opposite direction and had been lucky to escape with his life. The young truck driver tested two times over the legal limit and only suffered minor injuries. John's car, however, was literately a tangled mess of metal trapping him inside. Despite his injuries, John had been the one to call the police for help.

He suddenly felt a numbing weakness spread through him. He had been foolish and selfish. Since getting the call earlier, not once had he thought of his brother as the innocent victim. In fact, he had come here ready to give him an earful about responsibility and maturity.

With a heavy pit in his stomach, he made his way back to his brother's room. _No wonder he didn't want to talk about it earlier_. He was relieved to find his brother sleeping. Though he knew he needed to apologise, his ego wasn't quite ready yet; something about being a Sheppard. Sinking into a bedside chair he started the waiting game he knew so well.


	5. Chapter 5 Part 1 I'm going back

_**Author's note:**__ I am so __**so**__ sorry for the very long delay. My computer crashed last week and there was nothing I could do but wait till it was fixed. I still haven't finished the last chapter but I'm busy this week-end and won't be working on it till next week. So until then here's a small piece of what I already had. My goal is to have the last chapter posted by the end of the next week._

_I don't own any of the characters._

_Again I'm sorry._

**Chapter 5:** I'm going back

David was on the first available flight the second he had gotten the news. He had left phone messages for his father but never really expected him to return them either; that wasn't the important thing right now. For the first time in years, David truly felt anxious. After all the years of fooling himself, he suddenly realised how worried he would always be about his younger brother.

When John had joined the military, the family had accepted his choice, though very reluctantly. To them it really was one of the better decisions he had ever made. Everyone assumed John would serve his required time and then return to the high lifestyle that Sheppard Industries had provided them with. It was no secret that Patrick's youngest son lacked a sense of determination and never took anything seriously. Everyone assumed this latest venture would be no different. Once John saw how much hard physical work joining the air force meant, surly he would quite that as well.

Patrick Sheppard liked to be in control. Anything that bore his name represented him and so was expected to conduct themselves as such. David had accepted the fact years ago and was relishing in a prosperous business and lifestyle at his father's side. He had never thought of doing anything else. John on the other hand would rather be doing anything else.

John had always gone against the current; always choosing schools or jobs or careers where his father had little to no influence or control. These choices had been the factors that led to the great divide between the two. As far as he knew, they hadn't spoken once since he shipped out.

David checked his watch again. He would be landing in 40 minutes or so. Not only was John injured, he was too unstable to fly back to the US right away. It wasn't until 2 weeks later that they flew him back home. The military had told him next to nothing about what had happened other than John had been captured a month ago and held captive. Why hadn't they called him earlier? Why didn't he know his brother was missing right away? He knew there was something else going on here. Maybe John was on a secret mission.

There was a car waiting for him as he stepped off the plane. The driver drove him straight to the hospital. As his footsteps echoed in the near empty hall, he found himself working overtime just to remember to breath. _Come on David, just like a business meeting. Don't lose face._ Taking a deep breath, he rounded the corner into his brother's hospital room.

Miraculously he made it to the empty chair without fainting. John looked bad. He was pale and looked like he hadn't eaten in, well, a month. He had no shirt but most of his torso was covered in bandages. His left shoulder looked like it was dislocated and the deep purple bruising looked painful.

"Jesus John, what happened to you?" David knew he wouldn't get an answer in return but he needed anything to break the silence. He hadn't liked the idea of John joining the air force and now looking down at his brother he hated the idea even more. He sank deeper into the chair and closed his eyes.


	6. Chapter 5 part 2 I'm going back

_Author's note: Sorry for the extremely long wait. Long story short, my computer broke and by the time it got fixed, I had lost my trail of thought. Anyway, here's the conclusion. I had an epilogue planned with Patrick but it's since developed into a one chapter story of its own; so stay tuned for that._

_TZ_

**Chapter 5, part 2** – I'm going back

It had already been three weeks since David had brought his brother back home. John had refused to sign the dismissal papers when they left the hospital and so David decided to be patient and not press the issue. His brother had never been one to stick to something for too long. Dave had taken some time off work to spend with his brother but Patrick managed to keep himself very busy.

"What do you want to do this afternoon?" David took one of the seats next to his bother that faced out towards the yard. Though John had never been one to prolong useless conversation, it seemed that John was much quieter than before. He was still John, but something was different. The carefree attitude he always had was still there but every once in a while he would get a glimpse of something else in his brother, something new; something darker.

John refused to talk about how he had gotten injured. All he would say was that the entire incident was classified but David doubted that was the only reason. Patrick had inquired for more information from the Airforce but they too remained tight lipped.

"We can take a drive to the beach; it's a nice day for it."

"I'm going back."

David turned to face his brother, not entirely sure he had understood him correctly. "What?"

"As soon as I'm cleared for active duty, I'm going back." David stared at John. The bruises still hadn't faded, his shoulder still hurt and yet he wanted to go back to the front lines?

Taking in a deep breath, David tried to reason with him. He had been mentally preparing for this. "John no one will think you a coward for leaving the military. You've made your point, now it's time to grow up and come get a real job."

"Dave, I have a job and it's not finished." Remarkably, John had managed to keep his voice even. For the first time in days, John made direct eye contact with his brother before turning his attention back towards the yard.

"You don't have to do this. Dad kept you a position at Sheppard Industries and everyone will be happy to have you on board." He tried to match his brother's even tone and not let his frustrations show. "Just think about it, you'll see that…"

"I've made up my mind." Abruptly, John pulled himself out of the chair slightly wincing as his muscles moved. "I'm going back David."

David watched in disbelief as his brother made his way back inside. "So you'd rather head to war than stay with your family?" David hadn't meant to say it out loud but the past few days had tested his patience on every level.

He was surprised to see John stop in his tracks; his fist clenched at his side. After a long silence, John finally turned towards his older brother and for a second, David almost didn't recognize the man in front of him. "I never wanted to work for the company." Though his tone was controlled, David could feel the underlying tension in his voice. "I'm not like you or Dad; why can't you accept that."

David stared back at his brother as the silence stretched between the two. "What happened to you?" Since John had come back home, his military career had been barely discussed. When he saw his younger brother's jaw tightened, David knew he wasn't going to get any more information but he was too angry to let it drop. "What happened out there?"

The tension between the two brothers was almost visible and for a split second David didn't know the man in front of him. In the blink of an eye, the old John was back; lop sided grin, slouched form and nonchalant gaze. "David, I've got nothing against you or Dad but I've finally found something that I like doing and I'm good at it. I'm going back."

David watched in disbelief as his brother made his way back inside. Being the oldest, he was used to being the one give out advice and think logically; never had John been the one to play that role. Maybe the Air Force wasn't such a bad career choice for his rebellious brother after all. It had only been a few years, but this newer version of his little brother was much more controlled.

Despite all that, David still felt like his brother would rather risk his life in combat than work alongside his own brother and his father. Though David was a little hurt by his brother's decision, he knew for a fact that Patrick Sheppard would hear nothing of it. John may not have realised it, but their father had been worried for his youngest son. The military controlled themselves and Patrick had absolutely no influence; something the CEO of Sheppard Industries was not used to. Once again, David decided that he would rather not think of the fallout that would happen or the fact that he would be caught in the middle of another power struggle between father and son.

David was enjoying his morning coffee. It had already been a week since John made his decision but the subject hadn't come up since. Though he knew it was just a matter of time, he contented himself with the fact that had the moment John and his father weren't arguing. As far as he knew, physiotherapy was going well and John was expected to make a full recovery. Part of him, however, couldn't help but feel a lot of problems could have been solved if John had no choice but to resign himself to a desk job. David would never wish his brother harm but also didn't want him putting his own life in danger. Ironically, David's thoughts turned towards the fact that John still hadn't told their father of his intentions. Surely he was waiting till he was cleared for active-duty. Maybe he'd reconsidered.

As David sat in silence trying to figure out his younger brother, his father's voice caught his ear. The loud booming voice of Patrick Sheppard reverberated through the mansion. Curious, David made his way towards his father's study; the words becoming more clear and distinct as he approached the top landing on the second floor.

"I CAN'T BELIEVE MY OWN SON WOULD CHOOSE THE MILITARY OVER HIS OWN FAMILY! AFTER EVERYTHING YOU'VE PUT ME THROUGH, THIS IS HOW YOU REPAY ME?" David didn't have to guess what this was about. He didn't feel the need to descend the stairs and so he leaned against the railing. The yelling continued but David found himself straining to hear his brother's voice. This would have escalated to a yelling match with the old John. But this argument seemed very much one-sided.

"Jonathan, if you walk out that door, you are no longer part of this family." Everything seemed to freeze. David could barely processes what he had just heard. Before he knew it he was making his way down the stairs as the study door was opening. John emerged in his military uniform holding a small bag. His face was void of any emotions and he refused to make eye contact with David as he passed him. David could only watch his brother make his way towards the front door.

"John." Finally, David managed to find his voice. His brother paused in the doorway, barely turning his head in recognition. A moment later, his younger brother was gone. From where he stood, David could see his father still standing behind his desk in his study. The silence that fell over the entire house was overwhelming and David was having a difficult time processing what had just happened.

Not only had John left to return to the military, but he had willingly done so knowing it would mean he would be out casted by his own father. To David, that had cut ten times deeper. John had turned his back on his own family.

Months went by before David got any news from John. It was a very short e-mail telling him that John had been cleared for active duty and was set to deploy on a new mission in a few hours. Though David was glad his brother had thought of letting him know, he couldn't think of anything to reply, and so he didn't. After that years went by with the odd e-mail but the Sheppard's remained divided. Since John left, Patrick had been giving David more and more control within the company. It had never been a secret that John was a mathematical genius and so David knew this was his father's way of coping with a huge "business" loss. Knowing that, David worked twice as hard to prove to his father that he was just as much valuable as his brother would have been.


End file.
